Today's workout consisted of...

- Spent over 4 hours in the pool today.
I did a few laps, but mostly did aerobic exercises in the water when I wasn't busy playing with the kids.

- 4 miles on the Nordic Track.
Over 1200 calories burned, might I add, in less than an hour, to boot! According to the Nordic Track I burned 1200, but according to this calculator here, I burned almost 1500. Nice :) BTW that calculator is wonderful for almost every exercise you can think of! Random: I sooo want one of these.

- 150 regular crunches
I am kind of looking forward to my break tomorrow from crunches :)

- 50 reverse crunches
Mhm, done & done.

- 50 bicycle crunches
Ouch, these bad boys hurt.

- 20 REAL push ups
Did it, and it wasn't easy. I've never been able to do REAL pushups before! This was definitely the hardest part of my whole workout.

- 30 Day Shred
Done. I only did Level 1 because I didn't see a need to go all out since I did so much other exercising besides the DVD.

Other accomplishments for the day:
- Took my vitamins & supplements
Fish Oil, Super B complex, Chromium, Multi vitamin

- Consumed 120 ounces of water
I have started tracking my water & this is the most I've had since tracking began last week.

- Woke up at 9 & will be in bed by 1:30
No problem, I am exhausted! Andrew is working late tonight so I am not waiting up for him. I am taking a shower and headed off to dreamland. Looking forward to a solid 8 hours of sleep & getting up at a respectable time tomorrow!

- No soda.
Easyyyy! I do sometimes miss soda, but when I think about what is more important, health or soda, well - soda always loses.


In addition to all of those things, I also was very careful about what I ate. I wasn't nearly as hungry because of all the water I was drinking, but I forced myself to eat one thing, even if it was just some fruit or a piece of cheese or something, every 3 hours. I didn't go crazy at dinner time, and I haven't had any late night snacks, either. I'm proud!

I am looking forward to an easy day tomorrow. I only need to do 4 miles+ on the Nordic Track. I am taking a break from all other exercises tomorrow. All my goals & accomplishments are still going to HOPEFULLY be fulfilled, but so far so good!

How important are rest days between workouts and cool downs after workouts?

Are cool downs really important?

If you've been reading my blog for a while, you know I love doing the 30 Day Shred DVD. The first few times I used this dvd, I did the cool down afterwards. It hurt my back and my legs, so I stopped trying the cool down.

I was reading something interesting in The Biggest Loser's Fitness Program last night about how important cool downs really are & I decided to give them another chance. The cool down is just as important as the warm up. Do you ever workout without doing a warm up first? I know I don't!

A cool down brings your body back down to it's pre-exercise state. A cool down serves multiple purposes but the most important things a cool down does is it reduces your pulse to it's pre-exercise state and in addition to that, a cool down returns the blood to your heart in the proper amounts so it can expel the lactic acid (a chemical result of muscular fatigue) from your muscles. Signs of an improper cool down are dizziness, nausea, & an overall feeling of exhaustion.

In short: always try to do a cool down after any exercise.


Should I allow resting days in between my workouts?

Another thing you may have noticed is I am trying to do crunches on a daily basis, a minimum of 100 of them. After doing some research on rest days and their importance, I am going to shoot for 250 crunches a day 3- times a week instead of daily. Not a good idea to work out the same muscles so often! Kind of stinks, I love doing crunches.

If you are doing weight lifting or strength training in your workouts, you need to give your muscles a chance to regroup. When you're working out, you're ripping your muscles to shreds, literally. The resting period is when your muscle rebuilds & comes back stronger, appearing more toned than before. You also need to rest in order to give your body a chance to replenish energy stores as well.

It is believed by many that you should work out certain muscle groups only on certain days. An example of a suitable workout routine can be found here. I may try this schedule for myself this week! Not necessarily those exercises, but I like the general idea for the muscles worked on those days.

Do you need to take rest days from cardio as well as strength training?

No, you don't really need rest days from cardio. 6 days a week is considered reasonable for cardio, but if you're comfortable doing it daily, go for it. The thing you need to remember is that you should have one day a week that is a true rest day from all forms of exercise. It will help you avoid getting burned out!

Motivational Monday!

Happy Monday, everyone! 

Here are some motivational quotes to get the week off on the right foot:

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
- Mark Twain

Who aims at excellence will be above mediocrity; who aims at mediocrity will be far short of it.
- Burmese Saying

Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal; while others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than before.
- Polybius

The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible.
- Arthur C. Clarke

You cannot plow a field by
turning it over in your mind.
- Author Unknown

"The first step to becoming is to will it."  
- Mother Teresa

My new goals for this week are as follows:
150 regular crunches every other day (Monday, Wednesday, Friday)
50 bicycle crunches every other day (Monday, Wednesday, Friday)
50 reverse crunches every other day (Monday, Wednesday, Friday)
30 Day Shred (Monday, Wednesday, Friday)
4 miles a day on the Nordic Track 5-7 times 
Wake up by 9:30 every day & Go to bed by 1:30 at least 5 times this week (I am a notorious night owl, so I'm trying to break this habit slowly by easing into an early wake up time)
Drink 100 ounces or more of water daily
Take my vitamins & supplements daily
No soda

To take this list one step further, I also made an entire workout itinerary for the week for the rest of my body and even wrote down what workouts I would do each day and for what muscle groups. I am very organized and together this week, so I'm hoping this attitude carries over into the rest of the week! My workout itinerary isn't going to be a part of my goals list, because there are over 15 different exercises to name. The ones I listed on my goals list are the ones I am the most excited to follow through with.

I am aiming a bit higher than I did last week because I am trying to meet my goal of dropping one dress size by July 4th. I don't know how many of these I will be able to accomplish, but I am hoping to meet all of them. Realistically though, I'll be happy if I can stick to 7 out of the 9 goals I have set for myself. 


This morning I took my measurements for the first time in a while. I am proud to say that since beginning my exercise regimen, I have lost 9.5 inches IN MY WAIST alone! I've lost 4 inches total from my arms, too. Grand total for inches lost is 31 inches from all over my body. I am so proud!


I'd also like to report that all my workout pants are too big. They keep slipping off. 3 out of the 5 pairs of workout pants are from 2009, when I had lost over 30 pounds. I am so happy! I have to tie them up with hair ties, hahaha! Andrew will get me 2 new pairs next week, he says. I don't want to get too many new clothes because I am hoping the loss continues.


“You see things and say ‘Why?’ but I dream things and say ‘Why not?’”
- George Bernard Shaw

Kicking my own butt.

I have been doing great this weekend with working out! I went 9 miles on the Nordic Track today. I did 200 crunches, this time I mixed it up more than usual. I've mastered reverse crunches, oblique crunches, bicycle crunches, and torso twists. It's really starting to show, too. I put on my bathing suit for the first time in almost a week and I couldn't believe how much more loose it was in the belly area! I did get compliments at the pool from a few friends, too. In addition to those things, I also did the 30 Day Shred, and tried out a new DVD called Crunch: Belly, Butt & Thighs Boot Camp. I did arm exercises in addition to all of these things, too. I feel great & I can't even believe the difference between my body this week versus last week. It's amazing. I love feeling AND seeing the results all at once, you know?

People who haven't seen me in a few months will be shocked the next time we meet, guaranteed.

I also am really pleased to say that my father complimented me on how well I've been doing. He's not much for compliments. He says I am inspiring him to want to work out, too! When I told Laurin that he said that to me, she admitted that I was her inspiration for working out again! I can't believe how many people I'm motivating to better their lives through exercise! So happy!

I made a list of goals for the week which I will share tomorrow at some point. I hope you had a great weekend and have an even better week!

Did we reach our goals this week?

- No more fast food, even at the drive in. I don't mind splurging every now and then, but I want to go one full week without ANY fast food, just to prove I can do it.
Nope, I didn't make it. I went to the drive in on Monday night and had mozzarella sticks. Grrr. Oh well, better luck next week! It could have been worse though, right? I only had one fast food item this week instead of, say, 5. I'm pleased with this.

 
- Drink nothing but water and drink LOTS of it. I always behave & follow this, except on the days I go to the drive in. I had maybe half a cup of soda from Andrew on Saturday night & I paid the price with a horrible migraine. I am NOT making that mistake again. After going almost 2 weeks with no soda & nothing but water, I ruined it & paid the price.
Except for ONE gulp of coffee yesterday when my headache was really bad, I did hold true to this. I never drink coffee, but I figured the caffeine might help with the headache a bit. Can taking a sip of coffee for my headache really be held against me? I haaate coffee, yuck. I am going to go ahead and say I stuck with this. I've been averaging over 100 ounces a day OR MORE of water!


- Walk/Run 21 miles. It doesn't matter if it's from the Nordic Track, or from walking or running outside, I want to do this. Easy, 3 miles a day. I have been going above and beyond this lately, but I am trying a new system this week and seeing how it works for me.
SO CLOSE! I made it to 18 miles. I only did that over 3 days because I wasn't feeling well this week. It could be worse. Shooting for 21 miles again next week!
  


- Implement my new system of 15 minutes of intense walking or running on the Nordic Track followed by 10 minutes of strength training. Repeat as many times as able. No more marathon walking without strength training included. 
On the 3 days I used the Nordic Track, I did this and it felt great.



- Continue doing 100 crunches in a row each day. 
Pfft! I am up to over 100 crunches a day, and today I did 200! I have NOT missed a single day of crunches!




It could be better, but it could be worse. I completed 3 out of 5 of my goals. The best part about this is that I completed most of my goals even though I was having a really rough week. If I can do that on a bad week, imagine what i can do on a good week! I am so excited & happy. 

Now to think of what to add to this list for next week. Any ideas?

A little healthy competition.

My friend Laurin recently restarted her workout regimen with her personal trainer & has begun her new low carb diet. I had been in a bit of a slump, as I am sure you noticed. Knowing she was working out too gave me the motivation to start up again! I never completely stopped, but now I'm at it full force again. We were texting this afternoon and she said she was hopping on the elliptical for an hour. I decided to do the Nordic Track. I did 3 miles, and then did a bunch of arm and ab exercises, 200 crunches total! I did 3 more miles and then finished everything off with some more leg exercises.

I've been feeling horrible the last 24 hours with what I describe as an ice pick headache. Ouch. Working out at first was making the throbbing worse, but I am glad I stuck with it. Less than an hour after beginning, the headache stopped entirely. I feel great now.

I am so glad Laurin is doing this with me. She can help keep me accountable, keep me on my toes, and we can remind/push each other to do everything to the best we possibly can.

I had another friend in 2009 that I joined a gym with. We were really good about going quite a few times a week, and I think we motivated each other to keep going. I moved away, and she found out she was pregnant. Working out together ended, and I slowly began putting the weight back on. Up until that point, I never pushed myself as hard as I did when Alyssia and I were exercising together, so I am really glad Laurin is joining me! Luckily, I've built up quite a bit of stamina and I know much more efficient ways of exercising than I did in 2009. Here's hoping Laurin and I can lose 167 pounds together!

Do you have a workout buddy?

Food ABC's.

A is for Apple, what’s your favorite variety?
I love almost every apple I can find, but when I'm picking them, I tend to go for Pink Lady apples.

 
B: is for Bread, regardless of nutrition, calories, or whole grains what is your favorite type to have a nice big piece of?
I am hopelessly in love with garlic bread topped with cheeses.

C: is for Cereal what is your favorite kind currently (just one!)
Honey Nut Cheerios.

D: is for Doughnuts, you might not currently be eating them but what kind do you fancy? 
Strawberry.

 
E: is for Eggs, how would you like yours prepared?
Not a fan of eggs.

 
F: is for Fat Free, what is your favorite fat free product?
Jell-O Chocolate Pudding.

 
G: is for Groceries, where do you purchase yours at?
  Stop & Shop, BJ's, Target, Wal Mart & Market Basket. There certain things I love that I can only find at those stores. Grocery shopping is an all day event, haha.

 
H: is for Hot Beverages, what is your favorite hot drink?
Tea.

 
I: is for Ice Cream, pick a favorite flavor and add a fun topping.
I am boring, I want chocolate ice cream with caramel on top. Mmmm.

 
J: is for Jams or Jellies, do you eat them, and if so what kind and flavor?
Not really, no.

 
K: is for Kashi, name your favorite Kashi product?
I tried this cereal once and it was amazing. I need to buy some. Honey Almond Flax.

 
L: is for Lunch, what was yours today?
I had an apple. I wasn't feeling very hungry this afternoon. Had a horrible headache.

 
M: is for microwave, what is your favorite microwave meal/snack?
Popcorn, but only if it's burned!

 
N: is for nutrients, do you like carbs, fats, or proteins best?
Carbs. I am bad, I know.

 
O: is for oil, what kind do you like to use?
Extra Virgin Olive Oil.

 
P: is for protein, how do you get yours?
I am a fan of nuts lately. It's a new thing from back when I tried to be vegan (failed! :( very sad about that)

 
Q: is for Quaker, how do you like your oats?
With cinnamon and strawberries!

 
R: is for roasting, what is your favorite thing to roast?
peanuts

 
S: is for sandwich, what’s your favorite kind?
Maybe I need to grow up, but I still love Peanut Butter & Fluff!

 
T: is for travel, how do you handle eating while traveling?
Not very well, but I'm getting better. I pack snacks and fruits and veggies for long trips. 

 
U: is for unique, what is one of your weirdest food combos?
I am not sure that I like anything overly weird.

 
V: is for vitamins, what kind do you take?
Multi, Chromium, Fish Oil, Vitamin D, Super B Complex, etc.

 
W: is for wasabi, yay or nay?
Not a fan.

 
X: is for XRAY. if we xrayed your belly right now, what food would we see?
3 apples, some strawberries, a salad, a rice krispie treat, some pasta, and 5 french fries.

 
Y: is for youth, what food reminds you of your childhood?
Pancakes & cupcakes.

 
Z: is for zucchini, how do you prepare it?
Like this! I can't find teh exact recipe for how my grandfather made it, but that's pretty close. Love it. Need to make some myself.

Beliefs vs. Thoughts.

"One of the most important things to know about the mind and reality is the difference between thoughts and beliefs. The difference between a thought and a belief is that you may have thousands of thoughts going through your mind but none of them have any power except those that are beliefs. A belief is a thought that you make real, or accept as true. Choosing to make a thought real or not is a decision under the very power of the will.

It is important to understand that is not our thinking that creates our circumstances, but the emotion that is attached to our thoughts. Thoughts become things but not all thoughts become things, only the thoughts that are accompanied with strong feelings and emotion.

Thought is first a conscious suggestion, then it becomes a subconscious memory, working day and night. This is what operates the law of attraction, because the laws of attraction and repulsion are entirely subconscious. Thoughts may be conscious to start with, but they are subconscious as soon as they are set in motion. Now suppose I did not say I was poor, but came into the world with an unconscious thought of poverty. So long as that thought operated, I would be poor. I might not have understood the Law, but it would have been working all the time.

The subconscious mind is the seat of emotion and the storehouse of memory, therefore memory is tied to emotion. Emotion is energy in motion. The more emotion a thought has, the more it is able to move things. Weak thoughts have little emotion. Strong thoughts have much emotion."

There are 4 questions my counselor asked me to answer as many times as I could and as honestly as I could, and here they are.

How Do I Feel About Myself?

I am a failure. I am never good enough. I let everyone down. I am worthless. I'm a bitch. I am ugly and I will always be ugly.

How Do I Feel About Others?

I can't trust anyone. Friends will always turn their back. Everyone is out for their own best interest. I am just a stepping stone to something better. No one believes me so why should I believe them? Everyone lies to me.

How Do I Feel About the Future?

Bleak. Scared. Worried. 

What is Your Slogan or Motto for Life?

"Life is no way to treat an animal." The good news is, it ends eventually.

This is a pretty sad, depressing list. But every answer is true. I answered each question with the first few things that popped into my head. I guess I am a really depressed person. I know this sounds weird, but I'm a really happy person trapped inside the shell of a super depressed person. I WANT nothing more than to be genuinely happy. I just don't feel like I deserve it. And, I hate to say it, but I believe that until I lose the weight, no one will ever love me & I will never be happy. This exercise could help me in a lot of ways, both emotionally and physically, if I let it.

I'm supposed to break some of my answers down into more rational terms. Words like everyone/everybody/always/never are irrational.

How Do I Feel About Myself?

- I am a failure.
I've never tried to do much with my life because I am so scared of failing. But if I never try, I will never accomplish anything. I need to try.
- I am never good enough.
I have messed up here and there, but for the most part, I come through for my family & friends. 
- I let everyone down.
I don't know why I wrote this... I just feel so worthless sometimes because I had so much potential and it was squandered. I can recover from this though, I know I can. 
- I am worthless. 
:(
- I'm a bitch.
I think that I feel so awful about not meeting my potential that I let it ruin my day, year, whatever. I take my anger towards myself out on others. 
-I am ugly and I will always be ugly.
:(

How Do I Feel About Others?

- I can't trust anyone. 

I have trouble trusting most people, but that doesn't mean that no one deserves to be trusted. Not everyone is out to get me or hurt me. 

- Friends will always turn their back. 

Just because this was true in high school, it doesn't mean it's true now. Surprisingly, I've made peace with almost everyone from high school. It's time to let this go. 

- Everyone is out for their own best interest. 

This is human nature, and I really truly do believe it, but it's not something I should hold against anyone.

- I am just a stepping stone to something better. 

I believe that people don't usually like me, that they are just trying to get what they want/need from me, and that's it. Who knows if it's really true... I know I am not trying to use everyone I meet, so my guess is that I'm just a bit paranoid due to some pretty horrible prior experiences.

- No one believes me so why should I believe them? Everyone lies to me. 

Not everyone is lying 100% of the time. I need to be more trusting. Innocent until proven guilty, instead of guilty until proven guilty. If I am looking for faults, I will find them. If I am searching for the good, I will see it.

How Do I Feel About the Future?

- Bleak. Scared. Worried. 
I can change this if I TRY.

What is Your Slogan or Motto for Life?

- "Life is no way to treat an animal."- Kurt Vonnegut
I really wonder sometimes if this world is worth all the hassle and pain it puts us through. But are we making our lives miserable all on our own, or are we letting a bad situation win? There is good in EVERYTHING, you just need to want to see it.
- Life: The good news is, it ends eventually.
:( I don't even have words for this one. 

I am glad I found this list online and was able to recreate the exercise my counselor wanted me to do. I wish I had the entire worksheet & all of the additional stuff she asked me to do, but this is a good baseline. I now have a better idea of what I truly believe, and I can now try and escape this horrible mindset. 

Attitude is everything.

I suggest everyone sit down and answer these questions about themselves, you never know what might come up....

Composure regained.

I am deeply sorry for the outburst yesterday. I felt horrible and needed to vent. It could have been done privately, but I am glad I posted it here. It's a reminder of the mindset I never want to let myself slip into ever again. I am not sure why I let everything add up & make me miserable. I couldn't even tell you. But it's over now, it's gone, it's done, & I am ready for a new day.

I didn't do too bad, if you think about it. I splurged a little. Had a few chocolate chip cookies, but not the whole box. I did have a bit of ice cream today, but just one ice cream bar, not two. I had popcorn yesterday, but I split it with the kids and my friends dog. I made a frozen pizza, but only had 3 small slices, and the kids had the rest. Things could have been a lot worse.

Even at my weakest point - yesterday - I still exercised & consumed over 100 ounces of water. It wasn't much exercise, but I did my crunches & I did the 30 Day Shred. Can I just mention that I now do 120 crunches a day followed by 20 regular sit ups? It's amazing to feel myself getting stronger. I really need to give myself credit.

Lately I'm really focused on back exercises and anything that can strengthen my core. I've always had a weak back and I felt that building up some of the muscle might help. I even took a picture of my back a few weeks back and another picture today and the difference is amazing. I can wear my swimsuit with a bit more confidence now.

Even though this whole week has been difficult, I am glad it happened. It taught me that I can't let emotions rule me anymore, and that I've worked far too hard and improved too much to allow myself to backslide so much. My mindset has changed, and I am ready to take on everything. No more moping, no more whining, just action. I always tell my kids that talk is cheap and actions mean everything. Anyone can SAY they will do something, but the follow through is what really matters. I'm really getting on board with that now.

Ugh.

I am not sure what it is that is making me feel like such crap, but I have been in an awful mood ever since Sunday. I hurt my back and haven't been working out as much as I wanted to this week. Money has been tight because we overdid it on Father's Day, so now we can't get my weekly fruits & veggies. I'm just depressed, what's the point in exercising if I can't eat right?

I'm depressed because I should be working. I feel so useless. It's not right that Andrew works so much and I stay home and go to the pool and play with the kids. I am not contributing. I know I help by watching the kids but... I hate feeling this way. I want to get my head straight so I can get a job, and I know that part of what will help is me losing weight. But I just ... lost the motivation. I don't know where this slump came from, but I hate it. Things are great between Andrew and I, probably the best they have ever been. We are so happy lately, it's crazy. Maybe the guilt is coming from there? I have no idea. I just wish I got to spend more time with him, wish his kids knew him better... I wish I could have given him a real gift for Father's Day instead of just making a collage of pictures of our children....

Money is so tight I had to reschedule my therapy today for next Wednesday. I drove there and rescheduled in person & explained the situation. Totally embarrassing. I am not happy because I was really looking forward to this appointment, I felt like we were right on the verge of something big. I'm so disappointed I need to wait another week.... On top of that, I lost the list of questions and my answers that I spent 3 hours typing up. Because I share this computer, I didn't save the list. I suck, I suck. I suck.

Don't even get me started on the credit card fiasco I had to deal with today.....

I want to eat nothing but garbage. I went shopping today and picked up a pizza, french fries, cookies, and crackers. I haven't picked up stuff like this in ages. I actually am eating one of the cookies right now with chocolate milk. I suck, I suck, I suck.

I wish I wasn't such a mess. I wish I could start what I finish. I wish I was someone else. Fuck looking like garbage, fuck losing 1 or 2 pounds a week after HOURS of effort, and FUCK THIS DEPRESSION.

I am sorry for the language, I am just a mess right now. Over what? Who freaking knows. What happened to the most motivated girl ever with the bright outlook? Lost and gone? Hopefully not forever.

Whatever.